Quit my job

I started this job the day before Thanksgiving 2023, it was a pretty cushy job. I was a caregiver part time, worked less than 20 hours. But I was just miserable doing that job. I thought working a job helping people would make me "fulfilled", cuz people always recommend helping others when you are depressed or whatever but I didn't feel any better about myself or life in general. All the same problems I had as a neet were still there. Poor eating habits, poor sleeping habits which led to me being late frequently or calling out. Ironically my job was to help people with daily living tasks like cooking, cleaning, bathing yet I struggled to do those things for myself. I went a whole month without showering. For some reason I couldn't make myself do it, I kept putting it off, I thought I didn't have time to shower. Idk. I think all these things led to a mental shutdown where my job wasn't really the problem but I was just so mentally weak I couldn't bear leaving my house anymore. I legitimately hate going outside though I've been bearing it for a year. I miss being neet and just staying home. I just couldn't bear leaving my house this morning. I thought about calling out again but I knew I would just have to go to work the next day and the day after that... I did not want to go back ever. I called and told them I wouldn't be returning which is unprofessional in my field, the HR lady on the phone was very rude with me. But it is what it is. I'm just scared to tell my mom the news. She's at a pre-Christmas event with some friends and she called me earlier but I didn't tell her anything. She basically helped get me this job after years of me being unemployed. We also had an argument a few weeks ago where I told her I don't want to be alive... She thinks I'm doing fine, she will be devastated to hear such a turn of events when she comes home :( I only have about 1500 in savings, not including 3500 in stocks, and I should be getting money when I file taxes so I will have to coast on that for the meantime. I don't know what I'm going to do now. It was really a snap decision and I'll likely regret it. The job market sucks right now so I picked a bad time to be unemployed... I might be able to get in to a different caregiver agency if I get desperate again, I just hope my bad reputation/unceremonious quitting doesn't follow me. I'm just so lost. Dreading my mom coming home but also looking forward to just relaxing, calming my mind, resting my body, and being free.