Men (Gen Z and Gen Alpha), please do not hold hatred for women; it will destroy only YOU

This long letter is for young Indian men - teenage guys, Gen Alphas/ younger Gen Z's. I'm a millennial man and I am writing this for you. **As you know, people use social media to validate their bias; but you CAN find nuance, if you care.** There is a gender war on Reddit, X, Instagram and all-over social media really, after Atul's tragic suicide. You guys are young, impressionable, and open-minded. Please do not allow yourself to be turned into haters of girls, or be provoked to be abusive, threatening girls in DMs or painting feminism as the enemy. You think a conservative traditional girl, egged on by her brother or father may not file false rape or domestic violence cases? Laws will be misused by evil women, of all political ideologies, till our justice system gets its act together. You cannot change the law, or enforce it, so what *can* you do? You can organize peacefully, or start a movement, for an accountable justice system *without* hating on women. Get into friendships or romantic relationships with loving, kind girls irrespective of their ideology, if you already aren't. Surround yourself with empathetic, wise guy friends who have healthy relationships with women and are not women-haters. If you already hate girls, or feel disillusioned by them, please take a step back, stop seeking their validation for your life-experiences through hostile arguments. Please do not expect them to agree with you. They may have totally different lived realities and experiences and may not relate to your worldview. You should not be in the business of "converting" them to your faith. **Nobody is a saint just because they belong to a gender or subscribe to an ideology.** Half the women who identify as feminists *and* choose to have kids, will deliver baby boys. These kids will be raised with a worldview inculcating values that the mother believes in. Will such an upbringing make him immune to false cases of rape or domestic violence as an adult? In fact, it could be a conservative traditional wife, who decides to file a domestic violence case on him, or it could be a feminist acquaintance who files a false rape case on him. It is possible that both of them may be egged on by men in their family. Misuse of law and perpetration of abuse is not limited to a political ideology or gender. The very same Gen Z feminists whom you may badly wish to hate today, will likely see the world through your perspective as well when they become mothers of young guys your age in two decades, or when they see injustice towards young guys at their workplace, as a corporate leader. **Gen Z girl feminists will evolve. Or maybe not.** Some of the Gen Z feminists will also end up losing loved ones in their lives - a guy friend, the brother, or the son - to an evil woman's actions. Please don't be in the business of invalidating a woman's lived experiences no matter how right you *may* think you are. There are no absolute truths, theories, or ideologies in politics. Listen to their experiences but share yours only if you think they care. Decades later, some Gen Z girl feminists, wronged by injustice for their young sons, subordinates, colleagues, or friends, may also start to actively campaign about the need for gender neutral laws, and on the need to improve the mental health of young guys. Don't be surprised when young Gen Beta girl feminists of 2045 denounce the views of the then older Gen Z feminists as regressive or internalized misogyny. You must remember that navigating life and shaping a worldview from their experiences, is their journey to take, and not for young guys like you, through your arguments with them. There is quite a bit of cognitive dissonance even among otherwise sane people in India this week because in Atul's case, the judge and the apparent abuser are both women while the victim is a man. It will be difficult for some to accept that two women egged him on towards a suicide. **Your guy friends who harbor hatred for women, will evolve too. Or maybe not.** Half the guys, including some of your guy friends, who believe wrongly that a woman's life in India is easy, will father girl children. Raising their young daughters, some of these men will realize that India is indeed an unsafe place for women and that there is great burden on women at the workplace, regarding marriage, and via social expectations. When you have a daughter, you will also be scared when you read rape cases in the 100s in India every single day and girl victims struggling for justice, to even exist. Slowly but surely, some of these men with young girl children, will start to empathize with feminists and get angry, agitated, and start to repeatedly flag women's issues. It will not take 25 years, because the threat starts the moment a girl child is born. Many of your guy friends, will come around to appreciating why women feel so strongly about men being abusive. Unfortunately, by then the fashionable young Gen Beta guys will denounce your friends - the older Gen Alpha men and their views - as cope. There will be a new gender war, and you will be helpless. **Polarizing ideologies and divisive people are here to stay. You must learn to keep yourself sane.** And then there will be a new Andrew Tate. There will be a new Donald Trump. There will be a Tailor Swift. There will be another wave of feminist movement but there will also be misogyny and misandry. A whole new set of people and ideologies will turn decent human beings against each other full of suspicion, and hatred. Some old ideologies will be repackaged in a new bottle. There will also be abusers of all kinds irrespective of gender. In the race to the bottom that await us, please keep an open mind, by helping other guy friends when they are in trouble. Learn and unlearn every day. Challenge and question your beliefs every day, while keeping an open mind. If you think your teenage guy friend is turning into a girl hater, or has trouble in his relationship, introduce him to your girl buddies who are kind and warm. **Kindness and empathy elude the vast majority of us. It is a necessary skill, all the more for men.** Bottomline? People evolve while ideologies remain rigid. Personal experiences trump all social media theories. If you have a good life, show depressed, angry, or frustrated guys that good people exist. Help them if they are struggling mentally. Show them that the world can be a lovely place. Please give them positivity and hope. It will most likely change their life in a good way. If you think you can constructively help in making the justice system better, do it in the real world and not by threatening women online for a power trip for 2 minutes or to relieve your angst. Some of the things Atul wrote in his letter are very disturbing, particularly his views on women. While you advocate for justice for Atul, please do not subscribe to women hatred. Was he driven to such an extent by his wife's toxic behavior? Is that what turned him into a woman hater? We don't know yet. In the end, the loss was only his, and for people who loved him. May he rest in peace. Please don't be consumed by hate, for it will destroy ONLY you.