I feel that I don't fit into this world.

(25M)I feel terribly unwell, I have physical and mental health problems. Neet since finishing high school. I have never worked. I don't know how to relate to people, I have a sad look on my face all the time and I isolate myself from people, but yet I feel that I miss someone close to me, but I can't, I think it's an avoidant personality, I'm afraid to open up to another person. I feel quite a contrast between people and me. The only thing I feel like doing is lying in bed all day, before bed I have thoughts of never waking up again. Zero ambition and motivation to live. I'm dependent on my parents, but I can't cope anymore anyway, my health is deteriorating and I can't stand suffering. I don't know if I could manage to hold down a job? I don't have the strength, I'm overwhelmed by life. I don't know what to do next, I suffer every day. I wish God would have mercy and take me away from here.