In my case I can’t say it’s a lack of social skills it’s a fundamentally bad way of looking at people and myself

I was wondering why I failed so much. I could not keep jobs I had and switched often and now I can't get a job at all and have been long term unemployed. I hear often this mention of "social skills". I feel like if I were to chalk up my failures to "skills" it's like saying I had good intentions but failed to execute. But when I think about what really happened it wasn't like that. I failed because I was not proactive, I was avoiding work, I avoided integrating myself with others or the work environment. I was proud and unwilling to ask for help from others when I was in trouble and didn't know what to do. Instead I got resentful and made my own bad choices. I saw others in an uncharitable light believing they didn't like me and also I didn't like them. My failures are my fault for being for a lack of a better term a bad person. I don't think that is an accurate statement because it's not like it's so simple. But when I think about my mistakes I can't say it's because I lacked social skills. It's because I was immoral, uncharitable, proud, weak, afraid of criticism, avoiding work, and afraid to ask for help. Why? Because I was arrogant and short sighted. Everything bad about me you can say, is true. I deserve my failure and worse. In fact, if I did not fail, that would be a travesty. My whole orientation was on serving myself and being as lazy and self centered as possible. I hated when anyone ever challenged my self pitying worldview and felt offended. I could never take advice or criticism because I had such low self esteem and overcompensated with pathologically selfish behavior. Never was I conscientious. Never did I care about others. I have been a very bad person and anyone who dislikes me, fears me, criticizes me, or has an automatic repulsion or dislike of me, is fully justified and correct in their assumptions. I never hurt others or was violent or stole or anything like that. But I was a selfish person and didn't do anything to care about others my whole life. I only cared about myself and had only suspicion towards others. Sure I could blame my childhood but I feel that is part of the pathology of my bad person psychology. Just feeling sorry for myself to justify the wrong way in which I lived my life. I want to do something that cares for others but I don't want to just be a sucker that gets taken advantage of people with bad intentions either. I think for now I just want to acknowledge that I have not been a good person just because I'm not a criminal and don't hurt others. For example frequently feeling a victim to others is a way I judge people's behavior as wrong in my mind. I decide what is correct and incorrect behavior and I judge most people as wrong and immoral and they are bullies and so on. That in itself is a sort of grandiose judgment where I am in charge of deciding who is good and bad. And I judge almost everyone as bad when I decide I am a victim to them. Also my extended self inflicted pain of being a victim of others is a way that I continuously condemn others as wrong. And to the extent I feel pain, that is the extent to which I point the finger at them and say see how wrong and bad you are? See what you did to me? My pain is nothing more than grandiose selfish judgment of others. In my mind I deserve a treatment of a king or god or emperor and anything short of it causes me to feel disrespect. That is an insane position. It makes sense why I've been rejected from work places and why I can't get a job. They can sense I am a bad person. Unreliable. Not honest and not conscientious.