PLEASE HELP ME I AM FRUSTRATED I HAVE NO WAY I DONT NO WHAT TO PUT TITLE

I am suffering every two days due to my alcoholic dad, i just don;'tknow what to do i scored 80%ile in jan attempt i am trying to study each day very hard after January but my dad has left me no choice i waste my 3-4 hours of night study due to him and more hours thinking about it. mujhe pata hai ki dhyan nai dena room lock kr dena aadat kr lena but it cannot be done practically, i have tried so hard again and again to ignore him to ignore the fights the shoutings but i cannot help it. Everytime i need to get involved to help my mother we are only 3 in our family i cannot just sit and watch my mother get frustrated and crying till death i had to get involved. but every next day he is again back to normal for max 3-4 days and this same thing repeats, my whole body is trembling right now i do not know what trauma i am going through and i feel helpless while writing this message i don't know why i am writing this but i have no choice i need to get this out from me i never like to beg for help and get depressed i have always been strong but trust me no matter how i strong i have been today i am broke i feel like there is no value in this 12-15 hours study that i am consistently trying to do it does not matter i how hard i try to study my dad every time does something to like provoke mom and i just cannot be with him he comes to my room threatening me about suicides and all that is why i am asking for advice what should i do man? matlab kya karu bhai mai karu kya? i dont know about jee and all man i dont even think i can survive this my head bursting like real hard i am really not okay i think i am just blank i dont know what to do edit : i am not allowed to join library and stuff and anyways raat ke 10-11 baje koi library shuru nahi rehti neighborhood mai