Question on Ganesha chants

Hey everyone, I’m an 18-year-old male Westerner who has been into Dharma for a little while now. I’ve been stuck in a pretty bad situation for quite some time—feeling lost in life, not respected, frequently disrespected, and not really liked by anyone. I’m quite lonely and struggle with a severe lack of confidence. Since I’ll be on my own soon, I’ve been wondering if I could ask Ganesha for some help. Could I chant the Vakratunda Mahakaya mantra and Om Gam Ganapataye Namaha for success and positive change in my life without initiation? Also, is there any way I could strengthen my relationship with Ganesha? I’m afraid I can’t buy things like herbs, incense, or images because my parents would find it weird or might not allow it. They’re Christian and find it strange that I follow a very foreign religion, but they aren’t intolerant—my father even bought me books on it at one point. However, after some time, he suggested that I should learn more about Christianity. For those curious as to why I chose Ganesha—I’ve heard (though I’m not sure if this is true) that your Iṣṭa Devatā, which I believe is your preferred or ideal deity, can be discovered simply by thinking about it. The deity will naturally pop into your mind. When I tried this, an image of a golden elephant immediately appeared. At the time, I didn’t know who it was, so I looked it up and found that the figure I saw was Ganesha. Thanks for any and all input.