Can’t believe this is the only life that I’ll ever have

I often sit back and just genuinely can’t believe god gave me this life. The ONE life I will ever have is this … Ugly, Low IQ, mental illness, autism, adhd, you name it. It’s like I am living in a perpetual nightmare with no escape, and the worst part is, THIS IS MY ONLY LIFE I WILL EVER LIVE. I will never get another shot at this, and this is the hand that I’ve been unfortunately dealt… I don’t even know what to do anymore, I really do want to make the most of my life and experience everything that I possibly can. On the other hand, what is the point? Given the unfortunate circumstances, I’ll never truly become anything or live a happy life. I envy gifted people so much, I can’t imagine what its like to be normal