So while I have become a neet ever since October,It kind of feels like i replaced real life stress within online stress. Ive been trying to recover from it for a while and I've been getting better at that but yeah I can't focus on what needs to be done.

I'm not talking about "getting my life together" i don't need that. Just being able to do the simple stuff like showers or going outside a little. At least for 10 minutes or something. I haven't done that in a while. I think in general i didn't like me focusing on myself. I a lot of times it feels worthless to do something even if its good for me to do it so I don't do it. I have gone too far in my "giving up,letting go" thing. I didnt like the wasted energy i spent on the internet getting stressed but I think i subconsciously chose those distractions over putting any amount of work in my real life. Idk. The internet is better but (the social media part) is just as bad if not worse than real life.) I was interacting with anyone in real life i think I just didn't like doing things. Its been hard to gather my thoughts I feel like i don't even own myself anymore but I mightve preferred being owned than being free in the void. Idk why couldn't just relax but I think I'm getting closer everyday even if fail again. I'll get there eventually