Personal NEET crisis

I never graduated, though im supposed to this year. I stopped attending school around the 7th grade because of my internet addiction and now i have to settle for a ged. I know it isnt much of a difference to a diploma, or so I’ve been told, but it feels like a huge underachievement and i’ve never been able to convince myself otherwise. And i will admit, im not that bright nor ambitious, but I believe i can do better. I just have to get out of my shell, or comfort zone. Not sure what to do with that thought since I’m lazy and unmotivated. There was a time where i kept telling myself that its fine cus all of that must mean that i have no purpose and the universe is set to kill me off early, but i dont even go outside so what are the chances???? This is embarrassing but i had to share or else i’ll go nuts. I wish to be successful and I pray this ged will give me a head start at least.