My self pity and victimization is judgment, grandiosity, and attack.

Whenever I go around depressed thinking others are mean to me, others have treated me poorly, others have hurt me, they bully me, they oppress me - This is when I am at my highest and most grandiose. I believe I am the judge of the world. I know better than anyone even God. I am in charge of their judgment and I have judged them guilty. And my self afflicted suffering is evidence of that. The more I make myself suffer, the more I perceive them as my oppressors, the more self righteous I become. Without knowing it, I became the judge of the world who drives a knife in himself to prove his status as ultimate judge.