How do I accept my life as a NEET?

So I recently turned 25 and I have absolutely nothing going for me. I am 5'4, autistic, mentally ill, etc. heck, I can't even drive! I'm also a khhv. Any time I try anything to improve my life (I tried joining the military, I couldn't even get through boot camp. I keep failing out of college and gambling with my financial aid.) it always goes bad. And I'm tired of working subhuman warehouse jobs. I want to finally accept my place in society and natural selection. I have a lot of anxiety and I am terrified of death so I will never be suicidal. NEET where I can be comfy in bed a day seems like my only option at this point. I know my mom would never kick me out.