wtf shld i do????(12th already started)

WTF SHLD I DO?? I AM DYING OF THE PACE OF MY SHITASS INSTITUTE'S SCHEDULE(whoever planned it go to fucking hell mofo) nothing i am able to understand and thos mofos r telling they'll start 12th already, first of all couldnt understand any shit in 11th (the part after wpe is fucked in physics and chemistry and maths r totally rodded). blame me and say i dint study anything but plz understand my fucking situation right now ,i go to college at 8:00am come back at 6:30pm.That's like 10 grueling hours of studying ( the isolation i feel sitting in a cubicle and learning things for 9 hours where the teachers are blasting their voices into ur ears) is quite depressing cause that's the only thing i do for the whole day and then come home. home makes me a lot comfortable cause thats the only time i feel like i am free(cause i feel like im locked up or something in that college),so i use the whole free time that i get in my house to do everything except studying. This daily routine of going to college and coming back to home has truly destroyed my fucking prep. dont know what to do. How shld i solve questions just after reading theory for 9 hours man, can u tell how to manage this and motivate myself to study in 12th. plz this is a serious issue as i am feeling depressed everyday feeling like to not wake up ever again!!!