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Just wanted to know why she did this. Not a rant.
Admins please let me know if this post is allowed else I will remove it. Hi All, I turned 40 this January and am divorced. I am from Hyderabad but now I live in Canada and have a strong IT career, spanning about 15 years across the two countries. My parents have been urging me to remarry, saying it's not too late. After considerable thought, I agreed to let them find a match for me, even though my previous marriage, also arranged, failed badly. To their credit, they found a match who is around 35 years old and expressed interest in me. She is a professional teacher at a fashion tech college in India and seemed quite interesting. I was upfront about my previous marriage, explaining how and why it ended, and she shared her own marital history. I told her I was skeptical about remarrying due to the trauma of my previous experience and that I wanted to take things slow and be sure she was the right person before involving my parents. She tried to reassure me, even talking about our future children and how she would pamper me. While it was nice to hear, it didn't convince me that she was "the one." I didn't express this to her directly. She then started asking many questions, checked my Facebook profile, and added me on LinkedIn. When my parents created my profile on Indian matrimonial sites, they included the name of my previous company, ABC, for some reason. I didn't notice the level of detail, but my dad, being detail-oriented, included it. A month later, I moved to a new company with better opportunities and pay, which I updated on LinkedIn. She saw this and connected with me. LinkedIn shows the dates of my employment at my previous company. She asked a friend who works at ABC in India about me. Since I was no longer there, her friend couldn't find me on Teams. She immediately blocked me on all platforms (WhatsApp, LinkedIn, Facebook, Instagram, etc.). When my parents, who were preparing to talk to her parents, called her, she spoke rudely to my mom, accusing me of being a liar. I sent her a text saying it was okay and wishing her the best, even though I was confused at that point about why she called me a liar. I am not sure if she received that messaged or not coz she blocked me. My parents insisted I clarify the company situation, so I reluctantly sent a WhatsApp voice note to them which they in-turn forwarded to her explaining the confusion. I'm not expecting anything from her now. I tried to rationalize her reaction by thinking she might have trauma from her previous marriage, but it felt like a stretch. She had my updated information on LinkedIn. I'm trying to understand her reaction for closure. I'm now more convinced that I don't want to remarry. Can someone explain this behavior? Am I in the wrong here? Please refrain from negativity towards her – I don't blame her, but I want to understand her thought process. I feel my matrimonial profile, managed by my parents, isn't meant to be as meticulously updated as LinkedIn. Sorry for the long post. Here is the TL;DR version: Divorced 40-year-old in Canada agreed to an arranged marriage setup by parents. Potential match (35, India) seemed interested, but blocked me on everything after discovering a discrepancy between my outdated matrimonial profile (old company listed) and my updated LinkedIn (new company). She accused me of lying. Trying to understand her extreme reaction and reconsidering remarriage.2
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