Why suffering is glorified in pur society?

So, well our society has this habit to set ideals of great warriors and pain bearers who spend their whole lives suffering for "greater good", and dismiss those who find joys and pleasure in small things. Let's say if a person likes clubbing and goes there to escape from all the pain in their life, some moral police come up and ask the condition of their family. If a person is dancing to lead their head out of the chaos of lives, those moral police will judge them, setting examples of great leaders. Let's say if a girl is partying with her male friends or clubbing, they will be slut shamed. And often compared to goddesses to behold the modesty of our culture as if they are the only bearers of it. Tell me not everyone could be great so why society set such unrealistic ideals? Can't they leave the person to find joys in small things? If a boy likes makeup, they gave examples of how in past, men used to be masculine and fought wars, and be emotionally strong while today's boys are becoming soft and feminine. When we all know that war brings nothing but pain, divide and destruction. Here, I am no way dismissing the great warriors , I am just saying everyone has their own capabilities and passion. Why police them around, just let them live?