How to cope with girls listing out their list of relationships as they could always chose from the list of guys whereas I've mostly never dated?

All my life I've got traumas and depression and low self esteem and sadness and bullying and suicidal thoughts and being the scapegoat from everyone, majorly from my family. Now girls see me as a turn off because I had no relationships associated me as unwanted rather than unlucky. This makes me more sad and they don't want sad guys. It's a loop and i can't be myself to get into a relationship. I've no one to choose as an average guy doesn't get approached.